09.21.
22 years old. I remember the day he turned 18 and I thought it was a big deal because he was officially an "adult". I loved the feeling of dating someone so old, even though he is only 9 months older than me. I've been reminiscing about Derick and I's relationship a lot lately. It is weird to me to think I started liking him when I was only 15 years old, and him 16. He is now 22. A lot of time has passed since then and so much has happened! Let's start from the very beginning:
Sophomore year was the year. We had english class together, and he was officially funnier and cuter than I ever remembered him being. We still weren't friends, but I liked the idea of becoming friends with him. Second Tri rolled around and we had the same math class. Our seating chart was in alphabetical order, so me being in the B's and Derick the C's we sat right across from each other. I remember the first time we hit it off. He was talking to his friend about The Office. Now, I have always been shy around people I don't know, especially cute boys, and eavesdropping isn't something I get caught doing. But I cut into the conversation and started talking about how I love The Office too, and how I happened to have all the seasons. I didn't even notice how easy it was to talk to him, probably because I felt so at ease doing it. After that day we slowly began talking more and more in our math and english class. It took me forever to even recognize the fact I had feelings for him. No, I didn't realize it when our math teacher changed the seating chart and I was devastated that we were no longer sitting by each other. I even went through the trouble of telling the teacher I had to sit at the front of the class because of my eyesight (Derick was seated at the front of the class.. what are the odds!) No, I didn't realize I had feelings for him when my face would get all hot and I'd feel really uncomfortable every time I saw him flirting with other girls. No, I didn't realize I liked him when my friend came right out and told me I had feelings for him (because I would never stop talking about him) and I immediately got super defensive saying "he's not my type, we're just friends". No, I didn't realize I liked him even when I was on cloud 9 when he came to class and told me the entire story about him and his previous girlfriend breaking up the night before. I don't know if I was in denial, or if I was completely clueless, but it took a very long time for me to finally say "I like Derick." It wasn't until 3rd tri of sophomore year that we really hit it off. We no longer had math together, but we would be sitting by each other every day, without fail, in our english class. We always walked to lunch together, then went our own ways once we got to the cafeteria, and then we somehow ended up spending the rest of lunch together after we had eaten our lunch with our friends. At one of the mini-dances at school he asked me to dance, and made me hug him twice afterwards-- I can't believe I remember all of this.
It took a long time but he finally asked me to "hang out". We went to disturbia together and held hands almost the entire movie! Get out, right??? I was as twitter pated as it got. We hung out two or three more times after that but as sophomore year came to an end we slowly drifted apart, and by the last day of school we were no longer even talking to each other. I didn't know what had happened and I couldn't get him off of my mind no matter how hard I tried. That entire summer was spent thinking about him. Junior year rolled around and we talked to each other here and there, but things weren't the same as they were the previous year. I dated around quite a bit, but at the end of the day Derick was the one that was on my mind. I couldn't help it. I even still had that hollow feeling when I saw him flirting with the numerous girls he always seemed to have surrounding him.
One day in the spring I was driving my friends home and I passed by Derick driving his car. I had noticed it was him, but I was sure he hadn't noticed it was me. Ten minutes later, though, I got a text and saw it was from him. He asked if he had just passed by me in a red car. This started our talking after probably 6 months of not saying a word to each other. We texted a little every week and started talking quite a bit on Myspace. He finally asked me to hang out again. I definitely had my guard up because we had randomly stopped talking the last time and I didn't want to get in deeper than I already was and get hurt again, but I decided hanging out with him once wouldn't hurt. We went and saw Iron Man in theaters, didn't hold hands or anything. It was just like two friends hanging out.
I'm not sure how it happened but a couple of weeks later our groups of friends slowly started merging together. All of us hung out almost every day the last week of school, and his friend decided he thought I was cute. I remember Derick telling me his friend liked me and that he knew I was going to end up dating him. I was so upset! I didn't want his friend to like me I wanted him to like me. Derick seemed positive I was going to end up with his friend, he told me every time he saw me like he knew it for a fact. My friend told me Derick must not like me because if he did he wouldn't be trying to set me up with his friend. I was crushed. I had been getting the vibe that Derick liked me too, but I couldn't get over what my friend had said. If he did like me why would he be trying to set me up with his friend? I decided to get over the idea of Derick and I ever being together, this didn't mean I would get over him, just that I wouldn't have such high expectations when we would hang out. It's a good thing I only had to have that mindset for a total of 24 hours. On the last day of school all of our friends got together up the canyon for a big bonfire. Derick and I spent the entire night sitting next to each other flirting and talking. When all of us decided to go straight up a mountain on a mini hike, I made sure I was standing next to Derick. Going down the whole group held hands so we wouldn't fall, and when everyone let go me and Derick kept holding on. It was that moment I knew everything was going to be ok. Turns out he had liked me all along, and this night together had turned the flame into a fire. The next day I woke up and Derick and I were no longer "friends". We were absolutely inseparable. It took 9 days after that for him to ask me to be his girlfriend, and one week after that for him to finally kiss me. We spent every single day of the summer together except for the week I was at dance camp and the week he was at soccer camp. Of course we felt like we were dying all 14 days. Senior year rolled around and we were still glued to the hip. It didn't take long at all for me liking him to turn into me loving him. I knew he was the boy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and I would do whatever it took.
The Fall after we graduated Derick got his mission call. I was unbelievably excited for him to go on a mission, but I was numb. I was so full of bittersweet emotions. I wanted him to go out there and serve the lord, but I hated the thought of not having my best friend by my side for 2 years when I had been so used to spending every single waking second with him for an entire year and a half. Sooner than I had wanted, it was time for Derick to leave. Still to this day saying goodbye to him was the hardest thing I have ever done. The hardest part was not knowing. Every person left and right was saying "the girl never waits." I knew I had to. I tried to stay as busy as I could. I moved to Florida for 7 months to do an internship at Disney World. After that I stayed busy by working full time, going to school full time, and going on the occasional vacation. It took me 16 months before I was ready to start going on dates with other boys, and after going on maybe 2 dates a month, I decided by month 19 I was wasting my time, and the boys I went on dates with time. I knew Derick was the one I wanted, and dating wasn't even a fun thing for me to do to help pass the time, like many people had said it would be. If anything it made me miss Derick more. The constant comparisons to every boy who looked at me or talked to me were never good. Other boys never stood a chance next to Derick. He was still so perfect to me, even after not seeing him for months and months.
Finally December 2011 arrived.
741 days
105 weeks
24 months
1,097 emails
124 letters from me
and
84 letters from him
Later...
He came home. Just like that. Suddenly it felt like the 2 years without him by my side were nothing but a really bad dream. It felt like all the days I felt would never end, the letters that took forever to arrive, the restless nights, the emotional breakdowns.. never happened. I suddenly was 100% content with my life, and I forgot what it felt like to be unhappy.
When Derick came home he decided it would be best to date around a little. He had prayed about it, and his mission president, and stake president had told him to do so. Why would I say that people so in tune with the spirit were wrong in telling Derick to date around? I had dated around a little while he was gone, so now it was only fair he got to. I was ok with this idea. It turns out I ended up having to push Derick out the door to go on dates. He said he would rather be spending time with me than with girls he didn't know, or care about, but I knew we couldn't be together until he had dating out of his system. One month, and 3 dates later, Derick told me he was done with dating. He said it was the biggest waste of time when he already knew I was the one he would end up with.
Four months after that we were engaged, and 3 months later sealed for time and all eternity. I could not be happier about where I am in life. It is hard to imagine I could love him more than I do now, but I know it is only going to get better from here.
I love Derick. I love him. I think all along I knew he was the one, and that is why I refused to give up on him. I never got over him when we hardly talked for a year, and I hardly even tried to. I am so glad everything played out the way it was supposed to. Everything happens for a reason.
and the rest is unwritten. I can't wait to continue adding onto our story, and to see where life takes us. I can't wait to start a family with him and see what an amazing father he will be. I can't wait to grow old with him and see what an amazing grandfather he will be. I can't wait to experience everything in my life with him.
Picture timeline :)
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| 7th grade panoramic. Derick and I standing right next to each other but only because I had a crush on his friend... |
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| The only picture I have of us sophomore year, and Derick is looking oh so flattering:) |
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| Second to last day of school Junior year. When I thought we would have to be "just friends" |
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| Finally dating! |
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| One year later and we are graduating high school |
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| The mission call! |
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| Right after he opened up his call. Yep, this picture still makes me tear up. |
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| Saying "cya later" . Last picture taken together for 2 years. |
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| Elder Cox! |
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| Derick's study area |
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| 1st 3 months of my letters to him. |
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| I have countless pictures just like this one. Letters=breath of fresh air. |
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| Missionary Der Bear |
So close!
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| He is home! |
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| December 27th, 2011 8:37 am.. Woke up to this picture of Derick at the airport. Best wake up text I receive. |
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| Am I sad this is the first picture we took together in 2 years? Not entirely. I'm just happy he's home. The day of his return |
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| Homecoming |
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| May 11, 2012. Engaged!! |
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| August 8, 2012 Sealed for time and all Eternity |
Happy birthday, Derick! Just so you know I typed this up as a birthday gift for you and not just enjoyment for myself ;). I hope this is the best birthday of your life yet! Love you very very very very much. :)
